SEPTEMBER 2006

Its the fourth of the month.
August was pretty incredible looking back. I'd have never figured at the beginning of the month I'd be here now writing this.
So much can change in 30 days.

And I'm finding myself starting to now question a lot of the things that I've taken for granted in my life to now. Its like accepting this bit of me, and allowing it 'out of the cupboard' *hehehe* is influencing a lot of non-sexuality bits. I'm thinking about my career. And how I spend my time. And my relationships. And I guess questioning who I am. I suppose it was naive to think I could just unplug one bit of me and plug in an alternative and everything else would stay the same. but I kind of did.


Its funny how sometimes your radio MIX 106.5FM just seems to know what track to play. Of the thousands of songs on the thing, its played the same track a few times this week-a song at the end of Listen Without Prejudice (an old george michael album) that I haven't heard for years. The words really struck me though. Its all a bit teenage-girl-on-Bebo to post song lyrics to sum up how you're feeling but there's something here that really hit home. And as embarassing as it is to quote a George Michael song (it all feels vaguely David Brentesque!), in the interests of honesty with you, dear readers (teman2kuww), here goes!

'Well there ain't no point in moving on
Until you've got somewhere to go
And the road that I have walked upon
Well it filled my pockets
And emptied out my soul

All those insecurities
That have held me down for so long
I can't say I've found a cure for these
But at least I know them
So they're not so strong

You look for your dreams in heaven
But what the hell are you supposed to do
When they come true?

Well there's one year of my life in these songs
And some of them are about me
Now I know there's no way I can write those wrongs
Believe me
I would not lie you've hurt my pride
And I guess there's a road without you

But you once said
There's a way back for every man
So here I am
Don't people change, here I am
Is it too late to try again'

I don't think its too late at all, but I do think a lot of things have yet to change.
And I'm up for the ride.
Roll on September.
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..............
"dolf"